AITA for asking my brother to thank us when he just had a baby?

Sister in law and brother in law (35) just had their first baby and while they were in the hospital for the past few days, they asked me and my husband (32, who don’t have any kids) to go over to their house 3x/day to walk and feed their dog. We both share one car and have busy jobs so we drove back and forth in between our meetings and work this week to take care of their pets.

We understand that they are busy with their newborn but a simple acknowledgement or thank you text would be nice. We would send them updates and they would respond with “haha” or tell us how many times their dog poops, but never follow up with any sort of acknowledgment or thank you.

When my husband called his brother this morning to ask when they were coming home, he got annoyed and said they are still in the hospital for a few more hours and he needs to check up on his pets again. My husband told him (maybe not in the nicest way – he was heated) that a simple thank you text would make me and his parents feel appreciated for helping out this week and gifting his wife with flowers/balloon after her delivery.

My brother in law did not receive this feedback well and went off about how he could have asked his friend to help with the pets. He didn’t think it was a big ask and said they already received tons of flowers/balloons and don’t need more. His excuse was that he has busy with the baby, has not been getting good sleep, and just because he doesn’t express his appreciation “doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel it.” He said my husband won’t understand until he has kids of his own.

For context, my BIL and SIL have always been spoiled and entitled. In the past, they have never said thank you when they received gifts or when my mother in law delivered them food. They are “takers” and live in delusion – they believe we should be honored they “chose” us to help them. Everyone should be at their beck and call, and the whole world stops to serve them when they are having a baby. We have lives too and it feels like they are taking us for granted.

They said we should do things for them out of the kindness of our hearts and without expecting thank you in return. You can’t force someone to feel or show appreciation and now I’m sure whatever ounce of gratitude he may have felt is completely gone.

So AITA for asking for a simple thank you – when they just had a baby?